Certified Coach, Transitions Expert, Mid-Life Design, Reinvention & Revitalization Strategist
I am a coach who helps professionals (many of whom are also parents) to know who they are and how to leave a legacy that matters to them.
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I work with clients (smart, successful, mid-career professionals) who love the lives, careers and relationships they’ve built on many levels. Yet, to their surprise, as they enter mid-life, they are finding themselves feeling ambivalent or even embarrassed about these very things. There’s a sense of “wasting time” or “missing out” but no clarity around what that means. Many are struggling with questions like, “What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I be happy with what I have? Why can’t that be enough? Why am I still feeling angry, restless and unsatisfied? Who am I now? And is that serving my loved ones and team members?” They are actively asking, “What needs to change?” These thoughts and unanswered questions manifest into more self-consciousness and self-doubt, an erosion of self-confidence, more and more distractions and a growing lack of clarity, increasing isolation in the midst of the dissatisfaction and confusion, and a crisis in leadership, of self and others (all inside-out perceptions), even in the midst of a stellar career and life (true by many standards and outside-in perceptions). While these are telling questions, they miss the mark on what’s trying to happen here.
I work with professionals, many of whom are also parents, grandparents and/or caregivers of loved ones, who are deeply concerned with how our world/society is. They are interested in and ready to more consciously and actively do their part to leave this world better than how they found it or see it today. They absolutely believe that this is possible. They want to create healthier environments within and around them, environments that encourage and support thriving in all parts of life, work and relationships, not just the ones closest to home. They are ready to create a shift both within themselves and in the world so that their children and their children’s children, nieces, nephews, loved ones, team members and friends can grow up in healthier and thriving environments; so that they can focus on what is possible too. They believe this can and must be their legacy. It is their work to do. And they are stuck in the questions, “How? What to focus on? What’s next? Does this mean I have to give up my life, career, relationships?”
My clients believe that they can make a difference in the larger world, want to explore how to do that, and get into action now. This is what is missing. Knowing how to do this, what to focus on and why is what is missing. Finding the clarity, confidence and conviction needed to commit and move forward is what’s missing. And this is what wants their attention – to know who they are, who they want to be, what they stand for, and how to make it real; how to leave the legacy they want to leave, while also honoring the lives they are in.
They understand that their ability to create the conditions within and around them necessary to thrive (not just survive) is an integral part of breathing new life into the lives, careers and relationships they already have and love, and of leaving a legacy. They want to leave a legacy of greater health (planet health, flourishing local and global environments, and personal wellness/possibility/potential), beginning now. They do not want to waste another minute worrying about “the wrong things” and feeling fragmented and disconnected. They want to connect deeply to who and what matters most now and show up consistently, powerfully and as they intend, no matter what life brings. They want the rest of their lives to be an active example of living into this intention to be a powerful role model and make a positive difference in the world, while they are doing both.
I love my life and myself, warts and all. It wasn’t always so. I lost a sister to suicide, couldn’t save her and couldn’t save my family from imploding. I had a death wish as well, then. I am a survivor of three rapes and a violent upbringing. For decades, I was focused almost exclusively (and unconsciously) on surviving. The idea of thriving never crossed my mind. Yet there was a yearning for something more and better, for a world I thought I could be a part of. This yearning lived mostly beneath my conscious awareness…I imagine that it kept me alive. I had one of my first mystical experiences at the age of 24. On the evening of the day when we learned that my sister was dead, and I couldn’t sleep, I pleaded for “something, anything.” And I heard a voice. It said, “Say Yes To Life!” I did not know what that meant or how to do it, but was startled into agreement. This agreement has guided my life ever since.
I have worked hard to heal and become strong, to find peace and learn how to be the calm in the midst of the chaos. I wanted to learn how to be powerful and use my power well, which required me to learn how to vulnerable too. As I did, my work life thrived and I learned how to give and receive love. I became the more conscious, empowered and heart-centered human being I must’ve imagined was possible a long time ago.
Whether at home or in the workplace, I know now that what I’ve learned the hard way matters, enriches our lives and makes thriving possible. As a result of my own inner and outer work, I’ve brought compassion, love and creativity, powerful self-leadership, interpersonal skills and new perspectives to my teams in the workplace (I enjoyed a very satisfying 20+ year career in corporate America), to my family (I will celebrate my 29th anniversary in March’20 and continue to enjoy life with our four boys and their growing families), and to my clients and friends. Of course, I’ve failed often as well. This work has enabled me to own my impact, the “good” with the “bad,” learn, grow and move on with clarity, confidence and conviction.
I know now that my life has always been consecrated to love, to seeding awareness, consciousness and growth, to encouraging deeper healing and knowing, and to being a catalyst for myself and others to find our way home, to wholeness, integrity, true self and the divine within and around us. My outer vehicles of expression of this have changed over the years (from corporate leadership, to marriage, to anchor parenting, to coaching, to public speaking, and writing, to training, leadership development and advanced communications work). I am devoted to helping my clients to do their version of the same, and to operate from the intersection of the personal, professional, practical and spiritual aspects of their lives. This is what whole humans committed to making a difference in the larger world do.
My journey to self-love and self-leadership was peppered with successes, failures and challenges. For way to long, it was isolated and lonely. It makes a difference to be held and supported by an individual and/or a community that is also on this path to wholeness and making a difference through their gifts in the larger world. That is how I serve now, as a guide, as a coach, companion, and compassionate listening presence, so that others can actively be on their journey in the company of someone who knows the way, sees their brilliance and honors all parts of the lives they are in and their aspirations to leave a legacy that matters.
A typical refrain is, "Oh, wow, I never thought about it that way! This could change everything! I really appreciate the new perspective and opportunities to reframe what's going on...I’m very excited about this now; less afraid, more excited."
As one of my clients, Brandon, once said, “Dori will lead you down paths you never expected to travel in order to get to places you’ve always wanted to go and be the person you’ve always wanted to be!”
Wouldn't you like to walk through the world with absolute clarity about who you are, what you stand for, and the legacy you want to leave and can leave, every day - and do it? Would you be interested in the skill building involved, the practical and spiritual resources and mindset shifts that will help you both to stay on track yourself and model the way for others (personally and professionally)?