There’s a big mistake that people make in the aftermath of a significant loss. It’s so common that you may not even realize that you’re doing it (or that you’ve done it in your past OR that you’re planning to do it in your future).
This is so important I have to share this with you... because when you do this one thing ... you’re actually prolonging your suffering and creating incomplete and unresolved grief.
So, what is it?
In the aftermath of a significant emotional loss, grieving people are desperate to CHANGE THEIR ENVIRONMENTAL CIRCUMSTANCES.
Have you noticed that during a difficult time in your life, when you feel powerless, defeated, brokenhearted, lonely, confused and stuck... you’re desperate to do anything (or to control SOMETHING) to make those emotions come to an end?
“Changing your circumstances” can come in many shapes and sizes. Some of the most common are changing your job, dating someone new, getting a new wardrobe, changing your hairstyle, losing weight, joining new social clubs, isolating, escaping, etc... one common change that I’d like to address here is... moving.
Moving! People literally think “moving” will help them “move on” after a loss. I have several grief clients who moved to San Diego in an effort to get the hell out of their old city. They hoped that geographically relocating would put an end to their pain and suffering... only to discover that the depleting emotions of unresolved grief FOLLOWED them to this beautiful part of the world.
Although moving can be a healthy step in the right direction, it does not resolve the unresolved stuff. It does not complete what was left incomplete. It does not effectively provide the “closure” you need to get to the other side of the grief. Moving does not erase all of the pain, resentment, regret, confusion or sadness that our hearts are left with in the wake of a significant emotional loss.
This may sound doom and gloom - but there is good news... There IS a solution. The Grief Recovery Method is a short-term program (~7 weeks) where you identify what needs to be resolved and go through action steps to resolve it.
I won’t go into the details of the Grief Recovery Method here - but if it sounds like something you’re interested in learning more about, please contact me.
Happiness awaits you!